One month ago, it was the first Monday after my graduation:
I'd had mixed feelings about the ceremony itself (it kind of felt like we were going through a drive-thru), but I had a blast with family and friends. The 20 plus people whom I shared a house with all year, invited their loved ones, and we had one last college blowout to remember.. or forget. We stayed up all night, played 'Piano Man' and 'Tiny Dancer', hugged long and reminisced loudly. It was fantastic. Sunday however, was a sad day. I remember watching all the people who lived in our house leave one by one, and watching them say their goodbyes to roommates and friends, possibly forever.
I thought I was staying in our house all summer, more or less, until I figured things out. So luckily, I didn't have to say too many 'goodbyes' that day. Just a few "until we meet again's", but I knew in the back of my mind, my goodbyes were coming soon, and they happened a lot quicker than I thought.
But on that Monday I tried not to dwell on these thoughts, and wanted keep myself busy. I had work after all, and I have a tendency to bullshit my way out of dealing with my emotions with busywork. However; walking across the empty campus to the IT department, I felt like a ghost. I distinctly remember the hollow feeling of emptiness in the pit of my stomach, that cames from not knowing what the next step was. It was a dull and low pang, reminiscent of both heartache and nostalgia, but with the smallest twinge of hope. It felt like any and all options were on the table, for the first time in a very long time. I knew immediately that though it was a smart financial move to keep my school job, I needed to be out of Brockport as soon as physically possible.
Throughout that week and the following one, I had applied to every job I was remotely qualified for, anywhere in the US, as well as a few abroad. I was also filming baseball games at night for the Rochester Red Wings, and although it was in line with what I went to school for, I knew it wasn't really going anywhere. I scored 2 interviews in that time; one at home at a company I've always wanted to work for since starting college, the other for a reputable cable news station based in Albany. I felt I did well in both of them, but wasn't chosen to fill either position. I tried not to get too down on myself about the jobs, but I found it difficult. I was able to get a few freelance gigs filming with CBS sports, and with a small start-up my uncle is involved in. More work for the sake of being 'busy'.
On the night of my CBS gig, I received a phone call, from my now current boss, offering me a position with ValleyCrest Productions, the company currently behind "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?". I had spoken briefly with her before, but thought never in a million years would I receive a call back, due to my hesitancy at the time about moving to another state in the coming 7 days time. I asked for 24 hours to consider, she gave me 12.
I'm so thankful I was able to be around media people when I got that phone call, because after several encouraging conversations with them, I knew what I had to do. This position was a once in a lifetime opportunity that I absolutely needed to take, though I didn't believe it just yet.
I called my family, also hesitant, and friends, who were more encouraging. I started listing the pro's and con's, and I realized I was looking for a reason to NOT take the job. All I was thinking about was what would go wrong with moving, getting fired and having to come back, and how scary it would be to start a new life. I knew deep down, that this chance was what I had been waiting for since graduating high school, and that to grow as a person, I had to take a leap of faith.
So I did; In one weeks time I quit three jobs, broke a lease, tearfully had to say goodbye to my dog (for now), family and friends, packed up every thing I could cram into my Impala, and drove 400 miles to the east coast, in Stamford, Connecticut. When I got here I had no place to stay, and very little extra cash. This was an extremely hard thing to do; and there were more than a handful of moments that I almost lost my nerve.
But pulling into Connecticut, despite all the uncertainly now facing me, I could not have been happier. I can't in a long time,remember being so proud of myself, and absolutely sure with a choice. I felt like this is the stuff dreams are made of, and every great Hollywood story has a chapter in it just like the one I was now writing. And now a week after that, and through the magic of the internet, I now have a new house, in a town I'd never been too, and am having the absolute time of my life. I love my job, the people I work with, and the fact I get to explore again, something I've sorely missed.
So I guess the lesson is, when opportunity knocks, answer the door, and always have a bag packed.
More on my adventures in the Tri-State area coming soon.